Happy Monday everyone! Recently, Maison + I have been brainstorming ideas for different series we could do on the blog + time + time again, we kept coming back to the same topic: marriage. We so often (too often) hear people saying negative things about marriage + we want to take some time to do the exact opposite. Being wedding photographers, we find that having a strong belief in the power of marriage is what gives us the purpose + passion behind what we do! We believe that strong marriages are what this world needs. Real, tangible examples of what Jesus’ love looks like.
And soooooo, welcome to our first Marriage Monday post! (This series will be published once a month + will take the place of our previous ‘Monday Musings’ series!! We believe this one is far more important anyway 😉 )
We want this to be a safe place for you to come + learn alongside us as we continue to pursue the wonderful gift of marriage that God has blessed us with. In this series we plan to explore books, share experiences, + grow in our marriage … together. It is our ultimate goal that this series would, in some way, shape, form, and/or encourage you guys to invest in your marriages (or future marriage) as well!! To look past the stereotypes that so often get associated with marriage + step out into the unknown in faith. To trust wholeheartedly, love wildly, pursue romantically, hug often, laugh uncontrollably, encourage + walk through hard times hand in hand with our spouses.
To kick off the series we are going to be talking about How We Love, a book that we received as a wedding gift from our friends the Maloney’s. The Maloney’s are an awesome example of a Christ centered marriage in our life, so when they told us this book changed their marriage, we knew we had to read it! How We Love is written by a husband + wife team with a desire to transform marriages! Milan Yerkovich is a pastor with a master’s degree in biblical studies as well as a talk show host on New Life Live! And his wife Kay is a marriage + family therapist with a master’s degree in counseling! Wow. Talk about a couple with the right skill set to transform marriages! On top of this work-related experience, Milan + Kay have 35 years of marriage experience to add to the book.
How We Love is centered on the idea of Attachment Theory which shows how things we experience during our childhood create an underlying blueprint (intimacy imprint) for the behavior, beliefs, + expectations of all our relationships, especially marriage. Milan + Kay break the imprints down into four different love styles: Avoider, Pleaser, Vacillator + Chaotic (Controller + Victim) love styles.
The book begins by explaining what determines how we love (title aleart!) + then dives into the love styles that impair how we love. Next, the book shows common issues that arise, + keep coming back, when you combine any two of these loves styles. Using real life examples + psychology, Milan + Kay show how differences between love styles cause the duets that damage how we love. Lastly, the book offers healing. It lays out a road map throughout the book + also has an additional workbook on how to change how we love. It tactfully urges couples to put in the WORK necessary to grow as an individual + as husband + wife team.
Over the next couple of weeks we are going to be looking at this book and applying it to our marriage. We are excited, nervous, scared + honored (+ many other emotions!!) to share with you our journey. We can’t wait to grow our marriage + grow in community with you! We feel SO lucky + thankful for our marriage + for the wonderful community we have that encourages us to pursue marriage! We would love if you picked up a copy of the book + read along with us, asked us questions that were on your heart, or left us any comments or concerns you had!
We are Maison + Caleb, + we believe in marriage! It’s about to get real!
This first month we are going to be exploring what determines how we love! See you next month with our thoughts on the first section of the book!